It's official. I have traded in the mojitos for baby bottles, the stilettos for bare feet and the push up bra for the maternity, peek-a-boo nipple kind... They almost sound sexy for a second.
My life as I knew it has changed drastically but in many ways for the better. We often feel drastic changes to be a threat to our comfort zone without realizing that we just may have been uncomfortable the entire time... You realize your comfort zone was really a discomfort zone of jumbled up fear, insecurity and whispers from strangers... And as a result you remain stagnant. You confuse comfort for complacency and fear change not realizing what's to come is for the better.
Embracing my pregnancy took time. Luckily, I had nine months to do it. I almost felt pregnancy at my age (28) was "too young" - realizing many of my counterparts were still single and selfishly living their lives. I thought, "Motherhood is lame, boring and a complete inconvenience." The lifestyle changes that came along with being a pregnant, career oriented, avid-party-goer-night-owl were gradual but hard on my hard-wired ways and at times depressing. I was out every night practically even if it was just dinner with a friend or my husband. I had to stop drinking, which was always socially but let's just say I was (am) very social. Prior to pregnancy, our weekend began on Wednesday nights... From networking events, to checking out a live music show, to parties... There was always something to do and for the most part we "had" to go due to work/friend commitments. We sound almost fabulous but no. Hubby is a veteran Miami music producer so we often go see the bands he's working with and I work in PR and often have networking functions or events of my own so our nightlife was often related to our work life. Going out and not drinking wasn't so hard at first... After all, I wasn't a heavy drinker but I started to feel so out of place. What I hated was being pregnant and not looking it, just feeling bloated, tired and not myself overall. I didn't feel beautiful and I couldn't have a glass of wine to take the edge off after spending 2 hours changing outfits only to end up wearing something I didn't like once I walked out the door. I felt guilty at times when I was just so exhausted from existing that I'd completely sell out after snoozing through my power nap alarms... I didn't want to be the "Oh, she's pregnant and can't get out of bed" girl or use that excuse but many times I was and did.
Also, I felt being pregnant and out passed midnight was viewed as irresponsible or "wrong" although being home I'd likely be just as awake. Oh yeah, I suffered from insomnia too here and there.
Many times pre-pregnancy I would go out despite just wanting to stay home and rest. I learned how to become assertive and put myself (and my baby) first and to eventually stop caring what people thought... So what if so-and-so asked me to come out and was expecting me - if I didn't feel like going, I wasn't about to force it. I learned to say "I'll try to make it" instead of "I'll be there." That was hard because I'm a "yes" person and I genuinely like being out and about but learning to say "no" to others meant saying "yes" to myself... And to my baby.
My lifestyle has changed... But for the better. We all go through a major life change, for me... Bidding adieu to my night life was the most drastic. Pregnancy taught be how to balance quality time and networking, mingling, partying. My life is still fast-paced but on my terms not the social calendars. I started going out again with my husband after a month post-pregnancy (once a week) and I'm out daily with my little sidekick/son... He even went to a board meeting with me. I no longer care about missing important social events or networking functions the way I'd stress over before. Life is too precious to spend time away from your family and even alone with yourself if that's what you want in exchange for appeasing other people or "hustling." So turn down the invites. Don't feel obligated if you don't want to... Drink your glass of wine alone at home with your husband away from the crowds and forget to take your birth control every now and then... Step out of your comfort zone. Change up your lifestyle. Take up a new hobby. Do something completely opposite of what you're accustomed to. You'd be surprised the things you discover about yourself.
For me, pregnancy roulette was the best gamble of my life. :)
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